Crystal clear

I didn't run today. Instead, I slept at the park, and then in the back yard, and then for a short while on the couch. In between, I ate.

Um, okay, I get the point.

It's going to be 95 again tomorrow. I'm really trying to rest up now. Funny, a veggie burger sounds really good right now. That, and a nap, and pickles.

My shoulder has a fourth degree separation (not second degree, as previously stated - and there *are* five degrees of separation).

I snapped four (4) tendons during my bicycle accident last August. No, they don't grow back, and yes, this is the first I'd known about this.

My excruciating pain from my current(ly discontinued) running regimen is due to my shoulder blade bouncing up and down in place with nothing but a muscle or two trying to stabilize it, rubbing on the remaining rotator cuff, which is inflamed.

My options:

A) discontinue activities that will aggravate the shoulder, such as running, biking, swimming, tennis, racquetball, walking vigorously, and many other regular forms of my favorite exercise.

B) surgery to reconstruct the tendons from other tendons and sutures, which has some chance of allowing me to resume activities (and some chance that I'll still be in pain forever)

Physical therapy is not an option because, well, there isn't anything to strengthen that's still attached.

Now I understand. And I'm really disappointed. I know I really can't stand the pain to train for the marathon, but I really want to run in it. My first marathon. I don't want to stop running, even for this week. Every day, every morning, I take running clothes with me, because when I wake up, I feel like I'll be able to stand the pain long enough for a run. And then, I can't. By evening, I can barely lift my arm to change my clothes.

Okay, so I didn't run my 6 miles today. I didn't run at all. I have all the best excuses: I only got 6 hours' sleep last night, I can't run 6 miles on snow-covered ice (it's snowing for the fourth time in this city that normally gets one snow per year), I was coughing stuff up again.

Frankly, I could have run four indoors at the gym and chose not to. I may make up for it tomorrow when I start getting antsy.

So, this week, 11 miles, after a week of only 4 miles. My speed is not great, but I am not discouraged, since I've been running for only 6 weeks after, say, 9 months off, and it is at least improving.

And my shoulder is still bothering me, especially after faster runs. I'd really like to have that fixed, please.

I am thinking of writing to Catherine to tell her that the local running dude has improved my running posture tremendously, and I no longer have weird things going on with my gait, nor with my arm position. Or at least, it's reduced, and I continue to work on it until it's more natural to me.

Over new year's weekend, my friend showed me a book of Sudoku, and at 1 am, we worked our first one, rated "Very Easy."

As of Friday I have a Sudoku widget on my computer and I stayed up past 2 am last night playing it, and past midnight the night before. I'm not very good. If I were better, I think it wouldn't be so much fun. I sure wouldn't be spending so much time at it.

I also have a game where I play a pilot dashing around the galaxy, picking up stars that give my spaceship energy. It helps me blow off steam when I'm tired of the numbers 1 -> 9.

Also, I am definitely sore from running, in all the expected areas: ankles, quads, abs, and my dang shoulder. I'm expecting I'll hurt even more tomorrow, which has the assignment of cross-training 20 minutes. Since the gym is only open from 10 - 2, and I'm rehearsing and performing during that timeframe, I'm considering attempting the 20 minutes on the bike, which is on hotwire7's old trainer. That ought to get some of the lactic acid out, and prep for the next three miles on Tuesday.

I think I might be a crazy person to have decided to do this. But I'm really doing it for the training program, not so I can do a half-marathon. It's not that I want to run that far, it's just that I want to be in shape, and this helps me set some goals. I would be happy to be in shape to run 15K by then, and a half-marathon is 20K, only three miles longer. But the race choices are 10K, 20K, or 40K, so heck, I may as well train for the 20K, since there's a class for it. After that, I can switch to triathlon training.

Really, feel free to tell me I'm crazy. I might be - but I think the tradeoff is good. I'd rather be crazy and busy and kinda happy, than lonely and depressed.