Calm and blissful
Jul. 29th, 2004 08:47 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
talyenI'm not getting enough sleep. Staying up until 1:30am talking just seems so much more important right now than anything else in my world. And finding ways to spend all my free time with C. seems like the only thing in my world right now. She is amazing, and I feel wonderful and special when I am with her.
I find that I cannot describe her. I can say what she looks like, list her activities, and mention her work, but I can't find words to tell you what she's really like, or how she affects me. All I can say is that I'm happier than I've ever been, holding back less than I've ever felt the need to do, and stunned that she keeps wanting to see me, too.
It all seems inadequate. I have a feeling I'll be saying that a lot.
In the good news department, because of C., I am listening to more women's music again. And more music in general, which is very freeing. And I'm singing. By myself, to be sure, and probably bothering the neighbors because of the volume and the occasional pitch as I get used to my voice again, but I am really singing. I wish my church had a chorus instead of a choir, or that OutLoud was a bit pickier. Still, maybe it's time to think about OutLoud again. Maybe I can stand it. Maybe I'll think about it a bit longer.
I'm sure there will be more "because of C." or "after a conversation with C." comments. Right now, I am too calm and satisfied, and still feeling very private about everything.
I find that I cannot describe her. I can say what she looks like, list her activities, and mention her work, but I can't find words to tell you what she's really like, or how she affects me. All I can say is that I'm happier than I've ever been, holding back less than I've ever felt the need to do, and stunned that she keeps wanting to see me, too.
It all seems inadequate. I have a feeling I'll be saying that a lot.
In the good news department, because of C., I am listening to more women's music again. And more music in general, which is very freeing. And I'm singing. By myself, to be sure, and probably bothering the neighbors because of the volume and the occasional pitch as I get used to my voice again, but I am really singing. I wish my church had a chorus instead of a choir, or that OutLoud was a bit pickier. Still, maybe it's time to think about OutLoud again. Maybe I can stand it. Maybe I'll think about it a bit longer.
I'm sure there will be more "because of C." or "after a conversation with C." comments. Right now, I am too calm and satisfied, and still feeling very private about everything.
no subject
Date: 2004-07-30 10:00 am (UTC)Is C concomable?
no subject
Date: 2004-08-23 08:38 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-08-23 08:50 am (UTC)Are you going to Conclave?
Anne is going to have to find new party hosts if we have a party this year. I will probably be late and Katherine Becker is not going.
Another place we need new blood I think.
no subject
Date: 2004-08-24 07:00 am (UTC)Not sure about ConClave. There are other things happening in October, and I have yet to look at a calendar while thinking of all of them at once.
We need new blood for lots of reasons. Party people. Organizers. Do-ers.
no subject
Date: 2004-08-24 08:22 am (UTC)Do you ever go to First Thursdays, the book club or the Monday meetings in Ypsi or on Telegraph at the Dennies?
no subject
Date: 2004-08-24 10:28 am (UTC)I keep meaning to go to first Thursdays, but usually Thursdays are my catching-up-from-the-week day, my getting-ready-for-the-weekend day. I passed Sidetrack this weekend and realized I could probably find it again. Anyway, I do want to go sometime to first Thursdays. It just seems like fun.