Wonderful

[talyen]

You know, I am dating the most wonderful woman in the world. She's helping me grow, and learn how to do this thing that I've always wanted to do. You know, grow an amazing relationship with someone. She's great at making me feel like I can be me, and that there's room for me with her. I think I'm doing the same for her. Wow. Powerful.

Tonight I'll be meeting more people from her lab. Even her boss. I'm a little nervous, so I'm glad that I've met two people already, and I like them.

And then we are going to a dance. I can't dance, but I love to go dancing. I look funny I'm sure, but some music makes me want to move my body, and so tonight I'll look silly and dance with my eyes closed. And I'll be happy, and with Catherine. I don't think she'll laugh at me. Much. And not in a way that'll make me feel like I have to stop. I'm looking forward to both of us dancing, together. Hey, we've been dating for 7 weeks now: it's time for some dancing!


Seven weeks, wow. No time at all, really, and also all the time in the world. I wonder if we're still "dating," or if maybe we are starting to be "seeing each other"? These things are tricky, you know, and can be important. Definitions put boundaries on things, and I don't want boundaries on what we're building. I want to see what happens, to feel each moment as we have them, to look at the treasure of memories and pictures in my head, and share it all with her. And the future is scary. How can I predict anything? I want to grow toward the future, not plan it, at this point. I don't know enough.

At the same time, I know how I feel about her. I hope this is a portent of great things to come.


We did take dancing lessons at Manchester's Riverfolk Festival after we'd been dating two weeks. We learned to swing dance. I'm terrible, she's better, and it was fun. We are so in love, and it was fun to dance together. Afterwards, I was getting a drink of water, and one of the guys who was also taking the class asked me, "Was that your son you were dancing with?" Yeah, right. I told him, "No, that's my girlfriend," and went back to Catherine to tell her, "I'm old, and you're a boy." Some people's minds are so closed to new ideas that they can't see two women in love without having it conform to their own standards. It's insulting, and I dislike it fiercely.

Tonight will be much better. And I am beyond happy to be with her.