Epidemic

They removed all the trees from around the parking lot where I work yesterday. It's quite barren here, except on the edge by the woods. They were all ash trees, of course - here in Ann Arbor where the Borer has made its presence known and we are restricted from carrying wood across county lines for fear of carrying the larvae across the state.

One of my exboyfriend's wives has brain tumors. Yeah, plural. Her second bout with cancer. I'm not even close to her, still talk to him occasionally, but today I am more vulnerable to others' pain than usual. She is concerned that she won't get to see her 4-year-old grow up, that he will not remember his mother. I am concerned that my friend is going through so much pain, and may go through a nearly unbearable amount more.

I hate September. It is time for emotional house-cleaning again. Last year, I got rid of a girlfriend during this re-evaluation period. Twelve years ago, I nearly managed to get rid of myself. This year, I'm thinking there are some habits of thought that I want, not to pave over, but to allow to grow fallow while I take a different route entirely. Maybe this will be a good year for finding new paths.